Valorie Kondos Field

How do you define Winning in your organization? How do you define Success? In many arenas we still live in a “Win at all cost” culture. In schools, businesses, athletics, and often at home winning at all cost has become acceptable. If winning at all cost is permissible, then what are the casualties? I proved in my 37 year coaching career at UCLA that it is absolutely possible to achieve consistent excellence at the highest level without compromising the human spirit which often happens when we subscribe to a win at all cost culture.

Attendees will:

• Address what winning and success look like in their organizations, personal lives and at home with their children.
• Discuss different options for dialogue within their arenas of influence.
• Dissect why it’s a waste of time and energy to focus on things out of one’s control. Get clear on controllables and non-controllables.
• Craft their vision board of what Winning and/or Success will look like for them long term, short term and today.

Many people feel that Love is the most important word in our language. I believe it is Choice. Everything we do starts with a choice, which starts with our thoughts… what thoughts to feed and what thoughts to starve. Our thoughts dictate our emotions, our emotions dictate our actions. When we take ownership of our thoughts, we can choose our responses and all the repercussions that come with them. Once we take ownership of our responses the transformative outcome is that we are no longer victims of life circumstances because we can choose how we feel about them. Life is about Choice. The Choices we make dictate the Life we Live.

One of the most powerful choices we can make is to infuse each choice with Love. Love is the great transformer - it transforms every action into something with more meaning and more impact. If love is the transformer, then Gratitude is the elixir. Like Love, Gratitude is a Choice. Regardless of what LIfe hands us, when we pause and take a moment to find gratitude in the moment, it acts as an elixir… it alters our initial reaction to a chosen response.

Questions:

• What pervasive thought would you better serve you if you starved it and replaced it with a more positive and empowering thought?
• Do you feel you need to be motivated to choose thoughts more wisely? Or is it a matter of being more disciplined?
• What is a mantra that resonates with you that you could replace any negativity with to rewire your thoughts?

I have studied leadership for over 40 years. I teach a masters course at UCLA on Coaching and Leadership where we study many of the most successful coaches and leaders in athletics. One commonality of every great leader is that they sweat the small stuff. A maniacal attention to details combined with clear motivation and discipline.

We have been taught “Don’t sweat the small stuff” which addresses the little things that are insignificant. However, it’s attention to the little Significant things that are the ingredients in a recipe of Success.

When we pay attention to the small things, the compound effect is the materialization of the big things.

When I was asked how I lead our team to 7 NCAA Championships, I replied “we sweat the small stuff.” The small stuff for us wasn’t just the effort and attitude we put in our daily training, it was HOW we approached everything we did. The small stuff for us laid the foundation of our culture. The small stuff included daily enumeration of gratitude. Being honest and addressing each other with respectful honesty. Practicing grace with each other and ourselves. And offering compassion when needed.

Attendees will:

• Determine what a healthy and thriving culture looks and feels like
• Decipher what “small things’ are important to address daily to lay the foundation for a trusting, healthy and thriving culture
• Understand that “rules” are best thought of as “agreements” now. How to best discuss what accountability to these agreements are and how to implement the accountability

There are two basic styles of leadership - Transactional and Transformative. Transactional leadership is often dictatorial, authoritative and unforgiving. It’s very clear cut, no grey, no discussion. Transformative leadership literally acts as a Transformer within the Leader as well as within the person being led. Transformative leadership is about motivating change in someone vs dictating change. While a dictator style of leadership is faster and easier - in the long run all it produces is compliant good soldiers. Where a motivating style of leadership develops strengths of the person being led from the inside out. The end result is much more rewarding and life lasting. In order to lead as a transformational leader - you need to walk your talk - by modeling the behavior you hope to instill in those whom you are leading, you’re actually sharpening all of your Champion Life skills as well.

Most leaders I’ve studied actually embrace both styles of leadership. There are times where a command is necessary for the desired outcome. These moments are often met with respect and compliance if trust and respect has been built along the way.

An Indomitable culture is one that is impervious to adversity. An Indomitable culture keeps the agreed upon tenets sacred. An Indomitable culture has team members who have honed their power skills such as Grit, Resilience, Tenacity, and Courage. However, one doesn’t develop these skills by reading about them, being told to be more ___, or hoping they’ll develop by being in a certain environment. In order to develop and sharpen these skills one first needs to develop a sense of purpose. Through that purpose one can start honing their value. Through that value one can tap into Courage and relentlessly work on mastering grit, resilience, etc.

The necessary ingredients to build an Indomitable culture is for each member to feel of value. To know their role. And to know that wherever adversity hits, there is no blame game and the rest of the team has their back. That trust can only be built through impeccable communication skills, listening, respectful honesty, grace and compassion. Honing in on those life skills is how you develop the indomitable power skills.